Some guys are scared stiff at the prospect of settling down, getting married, having kids…and Joe White is no exception. He’s a divorce lawyer, representing one of his many ex-girlfriends, and above all else, he’s a bachelor who wouldn’t have it any other way. So when his mother desperately wants him to start a family, he’ll do the next best thing: make one up. What could go wrong?

THE TRUTHFUL ORIGIN OF WHITE’S LIES

by Playwright Ben Andron

People often ask what inspired me to write such a wild and outrageous comedy, and without any hesitation, I say pain. Not my own pain, mind you – I’d never joke about that… OK, maybe I would – but the inspiration for this play came from the pain of others. Ten years ago, my best friend’s mom got cancer. Funny, right? No? Just go with me on this… So his mom got cancer, and at some point during her treatment, she told him that she was ready to die, except her one regret in life was that she wouldn’t live long enough to see a grandchild. Brutal, right? I mean, here he is, this single guy, not married, not even dating, no immediate prospects for fatherhood, and his mom tells him that! Talk about the ultimate guilt trip! If it wasn’t true, it would actually be kinda funny! (Insert sound of light bulb going off in my head.) So that got me thinking… A dying mother gives the ultimate guilt trip… But it couldn’t just be about my friend. No, that wouldn’t be funny. Make it about the quintessential bachelor, the guy who wrote the book on one night stands. OK, we’re getting funnier. And then, when his mom gives him the big guilt trip, it totally messes with his head, and he starts breaking his own rules! Now the wheels are turning. Oh! Got it! What if instead of actually trying to change who he is, he pays someone to pretend to be his long lost illegitimate daughter so he can lie to his dying mother and make her think she has a granddaughter! Houston, we have a comedy! Now here’s the big question: If I write this play, and turn my friend’s pain into a side-splitting, rolling in the aisles (hopefully) comedy, will my friend ever speak to me again? Well, here’s the cool part; his mom pulled through. A few years later, he got married. Last summer, his wife gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, which we can only assume is his. And his mom is still around. And he will be there with me, opening night, at New World Stages to see the curtain go up on the play I wrote based on this whole mess. So happy endings really do happen.